Jump to content


Photo

Varin Rax, the student of Gaurr Zant


  • This topic is locked This topic is locked
52 replies to this topic

#1 Taralom

Taralom

    Self-proclaimed A**hole

  • Project Team
  • 1,519 posts
  • Location:Not here
  • Projects:Turned to Writing
  •  I R GOOGL'd

Posted 04 January 2009 - 07:31 PM

*topic can be used to give comments, suggestions or errors made in posts by me*

My character will be the Student, but i'll give some information about the master as well :mellow:

The Student
Name: Varin Rax
Age: 20, old enough to be wandering the world with his master
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Weapons: A silver Katana. A sword is the standard weapon that supplements the dark Magic that Varin wields, but he choose to wield a katana.

Class: Dark Mage
Height: 1,82 metres. *sorry, i'm not familiar with feet...*
Weight: 67 kg
History: He was taken away by his parents when a kid. His magic potential was noticed, and thus he was trained in a group of five other kids. In the end he was second-best of his group at the age of twelve. He would be trained for another six years, together with Ijan, a girl, in the art of dark sorcery. When he turned 18 he had to be taken by a Master. Gaurr Zant, an old mage who had just came back from a long journey, noticed his talent, and decided to train him. It was strange, because Gaurr had only taken one student before, and denied his experience to many young mages who had asked him to train them. Now that Varin has turned 20, he will soon have to face the world alone.
Alignment: Evil

Eye color: Brown
Hair: Dark-Brown. His short hair comes to his eye-brows, and falls in strands over his forehead.

Master
Name: Gaurr Zant
Age: 58
Gender: Male
Race: Human, with some Vyre blood, which gives him a better stamina than most.
weapons: A steel sword, and a wooden staff.
History: His history remains a secret to most. It is fact that he has faced many enemies, and won many battles and duels.

Appereance: Gaurr has a scarred face, and his once long, blond hair has turned grey. His green eyes speak of wisdom.


This is what i've got so far. Suggestions would be appreciated. An approval would not... yet be appreciated.
I will post a small story to show my current level of writing, and I will post the name of this... Character! At the moment i'm thinking of Ivan, but I've already used this name once... What do you think? ;)

Edit:
Questions I have:
-How strong is magic? Can you wipe out a city all by yourself? Or does lighting a fire from some distance exhaust you?
-What's the current storyline?
-How soon could I get in the story, if i'd start to post now?
-Is it okay that, once i got approved, keep away from the others, and try to get my head into english writing? I'm used to dutch at the moment...
-what kind of factions are there? Who is Evil, who is Good, and why?

Edited by Taralom, 13 January 2009 - 06:58 PM.

If the above post offended you in any way,
please take note that, until further notice, I don't care, so get lost.

#2 mike_

mike_

    Student of Homer.

  • Global Moderators
  • 4,323 posts
  • Location:Gulfport, MS
  • Projects:The Peloponnesian Wars Mod.
  •  There are no heroes, no villains - only decisions.
  • Division:Community
  • Job:Global Moderator

Posted 04 January 2009 - 08:15 PM

Ah dammit, another dark mage? Meh, could prove for some interesting 'I have a darker soul!!111!1!' between you and SWG :mellow:

As for the storyline, check out the topic. Maybe you could defect from Vayu's followers in the battle and join our party? ;)

#3 Taralom

Taralom

    Self-proclaimed A**hole

  • Project Team
  • 1,519 posts
  • Location:Not here
  • Projects:Turned to Writing
  •  I R GOOGL'd

Posted 04 January 2009 - 08:21 PM

well, I could just make him a light mage, or convert somewhere in the story ;)
If the above post offended you in any way,
please take note that, until further notice, I don't care, so get lost.

#4 Rafv Nin IV

Rafv Nin IV

    Vermin of Revora

  • Members
  • 1,224 posts
  • Projects:RPG Frontier

Posted 04 January 2009 - 08:30 PM

For magic, you should take a look at this topic. There is a great range of magical potential in our party (for example, Mike's character has only an innate resilience against magic, mine has mental powers and can control emotions, and SWG's is a powerful dark mage), but don't make yourself omnipotent. Nowe's character destroyed a town through his magic--but he is a druid and was merely channeling the power of the angry forest. You can certainly get exhausted, but how depends on your brand of magic--my character (Shava Kartaan) nearly died when she tried to simultaneously control four people.

You should probably skim the roleplay itself for an idea of a plot, but basically SWG has a personal vendetta with a mage called Vayu, who also possessed FZM's character, and we're tracking him down to kill him.

As for factions, there're quite a lot--this is the world of Arsencia, which is every bit as diverse as our own. However, just like you can't be in NYC and Nigeria at the same time ;), we only see what we run into or our characters flash back onto.

Posted Image


#5 Vortigern

Vortigern

    Sumquhat quisquis.

  • Division Leaders
  • 4,654 posts
  • Location:Oxfordshire, England.
  • Projects:Workin'...
  •  ...like a workin' man do.
  • Division:Role-Playing Games
  • Job:Division Leader

Posted 04 January 2009 - 11:15 PM

Yep, that should answer all your questions. You can make an entrance however you like, within reason. As for magic, that's a slightly contentious issue. I wasn't altogether at ease with Nowe destroying a town, but it was kinda acceptable because it was channelling an entire forest. However, most people would not be able to do anything even remotely close to that. Not even Vayu or Zhar (SWG's character, and one of the most powerful magi in Arsencia). Nowe wouldn't be able to do that at will, though.

But basically, if your dude is a human then he will get tired rather quickly, but has a lot of magical potential, probably. Humans tend to have a crazy range.

Your personal story can evolve as you see fit. You are more than welcome to switch allegiances midway through the story.

By the way, if you want to see a few posts made in English by another Dutchman, have a look on the early pages of the main story at Matias' posts. He's a damn fine writer.

Other than that, come up with a name and I'm willing to accept this as a character. Approved as and when.
I hope I am a good enough writer that some day dwarves kill me and drink my blood for wisdom.

#6 some_weirdGuy

some_weirdGuy

    title available

  • Hosted
  • 4,080 posts
  • Location:Queensland, Australia
  •  Weird Guy of the Forums

Posted 05 January 2009 - 10:52 AM

(SWG's character, and one of the most powerful magi in Arsencia)


Wow, i feel special :p

:p

Yeah, my guy is already a dark mage, but im sure there could be room for two. also, if you dont want to get in with the group right away you dont have too. But personally i would want to get in with the group, as thats where the action is. ;)


As for names... pick any, it doesn't matter if you have used a name somewhere else.

"I reject your reality and substitute my own" -Adam Savage, Mythbusters
Posted Image|Posted Image
Posted Image|Posted Image
Posted Image


#7 Taralom

Taralom

    Self-proclaimed A**hole

  • Project Team
  • 1,519 posts
  • Location:Not here
  • Projects:Turned to Writing
  •  I R GOOGL'd

Posted 05 January 2009 - 01:42 PM

Well, I have decided.

Varin Rax

The name means a lot to a character, and thus I always have to give it a lot of thought.
If the above post offended you in any way,
please take note that, until further notice, I don't care, so get lost.

#8 Copaman

Copaman

    Ryan

  • Project Team
  • 2,144 posts
  • Location:Lehigh University
  • Projects:Winning.
  •  Slowly becoming a Veteran

Posted 05 January 2009 - 01:51 PM

My only suggestions (and there are exactly 2) I would have posted yesterday but I got interrupted...

1. We already have a dark mage. But a light mage would be nice. I'd certainly like someone who could heal from a distance with spells. Teh Darkness is teh fail in a group of good/neutral align characters. Which brings up suggestion 2:
2. Evil alignment makes it hard to join a group of good/neutrals. You can't fight the good guys because nobody can die without permssion, and we can't fight you for the same reason. Pull some kind of something that makes us have the slightest sliver of trust... but that's already been done.


Asides, looks nice.

Posted Image

 

If you meet me:

Have some courtesy,

Have some sympathy,

And some taste.

Use all your well-learned politesse,

Or I'll lay your soul to waste.


#9 Taralom

Taralom

    Self-proclaimed A**hole

  • Project Team
  • 1,519 posts
  • Location:Not here
  • Projects:Turned to Writing
  •  I R GOOGL'd

Posted 05 January 2009 - 01:58 PM

My only suggestions (and there are exactly 2) I would have posted yesterday but I got interrupted...

1. We already have a dark mage. But a light mage would be nice. I'd certainly like someone who could heal from a distance with spells. Teh Darkness is teh fail in a group of good/neutral align characters. Healing from a distance sounds too much like World of Warcraft to me... and i'm not such a team-player :p
Which brings up suggestion 2:
2. Evil alignment makes it hard to join a group of good/neutrals. You can't fight the good guys because nobody can die without permssion, and we can't fight you for the same reason. Pull some kind of something that makes us have the slightest sliver of trust... but that's already been done. Don't worry, I've got some plans on alignment shifting. And evil is only the attitude of the Character himself, right? So any actions I'd pull off, could lead to discussions.


Asides, looks nice.

look at the red part^^
If the above post offended you in any way,
please take note that, until further notice, I don't care, so get lost.

#10 Copaman

Copaman

    Ryan

  • Project Team
  • 2,144 posts
  • Location:Lehigh University
  • Projects:Winning.
  •  Slowly becoming a Veteran

Posted 05 January 2009 - 02:05 PM

Healing from a distance does sound like WoW. Because I play it on and off. Meh, influences. You wouldn't have to do healing 24/7, but my character has a few broken ribs, a few more bruised ones, and a completely lacerated forearm and the only healer we have is an out-of-combat healer and is currently knocked out/dead. Again, as the character taking the punishment I'd like a casterhealer.

====

Alignment is really, IMHO, more like what the character is likely to do. In my head it goes something like this:

A good-aligned character would stop in the road upon seeing a hurt homeless person and give them some coin, some bread, some drink, and do their best to help with the wounds.

A neutral person would walk on by past the homeless person and the good person and not give half a shit - he's just as inclined to help them or to rob them.

An evil person would make the two die a thousand terrible deaths and then torment their souls for all eternity as a demon-slave to him.

Edited by Copaman, 05 January 2009 - 02:07 PM.

Posted Image

 

If you meet me:

Have some courtesy,

Have some sympathy,

And some taste.

Use all your well-learned politesse,

Or I'll lay your soul to waste.


#11 Taralom

Taralom

    Self-proclaimed A**hole

  • Project Team
  • 1,519 posts
  • Location:Not here
  • Projects:Turned to Writing
  •  I R GOOGL'd

Posted 05 January 2009 - 02:15 PM

you get it all :p

If there is so much need for a combat-healer, i guess i can think of some ways to do it with dark magic... But we'll have to see about that.

And about the alignment question. Varin will be egocentrical, caring of none other than himself. But his allegiance will change.
If the above post offended you in any way,
please take note that, until further notice, I don't care, so get lost.

#12 Fire Ze Missiles!

Fire Ze Missiles!

    Lord High NukeMaster

  • Members
  • 1,200 posts
  • Location:English village you haven't heard of
  • Projects:The Ziggurat generally, Apocalypse in particular.
  •  Refuses to be beaten by Vortigern.

Posted 05 January 2009 - 06:37 PM

Self-indulgent is fine; in fact, that's a good way to be 'evil' by only serving one's own interests but not actively pursuing the hurt of others.
Of course I don't look busy; I did it right the first time.
Ever stop to think and forget to start again?
There are 10 kinds of people in this world: Those who understand binary and those who don't.
FZM and Vort don't do tag wrestling...but if they did, they'd probably be the worst tag-wrestlers in the world.
Posted ImagePosted Image
Oh for fuck's sake!

#13 Vortigern

Vortigern

    Sumquhat quisquis.

  • Division Leaders
  • 4,654 posts
  • Location:Oxfordshire, England.
  • Projects:Workin'...
  •  ...like a workin' man do.
  • Division:Role-Playing Games
  • Job:Division Leader

Posted 05 January 2009 - 06:57 PM

Works for me. If you can keep that up then it'll be all gravy. :unsure: Welcome aboard, Taralom.

By the way, if you want to invite anyone else from your BfME posse to have a look over here, they're more than welcome. The more the merrier, I say.
I hope I am a good enough writer that some day dwarves kill me and drink my blood for wisdom.

#14 mike_

mike_

    Student of Homer.

  • Global Moderators
  • 4,323 posts
  • Location:Gulfport, MS
  • Projects:The Peloponnesian Wars Mod.
  •  There are no heroes, no villains - only decisions.
  • Division:Community
  • Job:Global Moderator

Posted 05 January 2009 - 07:02 PM

It's how we got Vithar :unsure:

#15 Taralom

Taralom

    Self-proclaimed A**hole

  • Project Team
  • 1,519 posts
  • Location:Not here
  • Projects:Turned to Writing
  •  I R GOOGL'd

Posted 05 January 2009 - 07:16 PM

I'm finishing my current RolePlay in Dutch, so that will come first.
After that, i'll get started!

I'll post a little something soon, though.
If the above post offended you in any way,
please take note that, until further notice, I don't care, so get lost.

#16 Vortigern

Vortigern

    Sumquhat quisquis.

  • Division Leaders
  • 4,654 posts
  • Location:Oxfordshire, England.
  • Projects:Workin'...
  •  ...like a workin' man do.
  • Division:Role-Playing Games
  • Job:Division Leader

Posted 05 January 2009 - 07:17 PM

A thought occurs: if you're not intending to introduce your character just yet, you may wish to wait until the current Chapter is done and dusted. It shouldn't be too long now, depending on the creativity of the involved players. I'm giving it a week, week and a half until we have a whole new storyline to occupy ourselves with.
I hope I am a good enough writer that some day dwarves kill me and drink my blood for wisdom.

#17 Taralom

Taralom

    Self-proclaimed A**hole

  • Project Team
  • 1,519 posts
  • Location:Not here
  • Projects:Turned to Writing
  •  I R GOOGL'd

Posted 05 January 2009 - 07:22 PM

perfect! That would give me enough time to end my RP, and i'll get in at a perfect moment!

Edited by Taralom, 05 January 2009 - 07:23 PM.

If the above post offended you in any way,
please take note that, until further notice, I don't care, so get lost.

#18 some_weirdGuy

some_weirdGuy

    title available

  • Hosted
  • 4,080 posts
  • Location:Queensland, Australia
  •  Weird Guy of the Forums

Posted 07 January 2009 - 09:26 AM

Hey Taralom
you should make your guy an umbar!

Umbar: These men are the sworn enemies of the Palatinate, the true name of the Order of Paladins. Interestingly, they too see Drow, Minotaurs and Dwarves as enemies, as well Elves and Furya. Umbar have never yet been known to fraternise with their enemies, but have, on numerous occasions, requested the help of the Vyre. Umbar too train themselves in magic, using solely 'Dark' or 'Black' magic.


I just read the topic talking about all of them and realised that your guy would fit perfectly into this 'class'...

do it, doooo iiiiit, you know you want too

"I reject your reality and substitute my own" -Adam Savage, Mythbusters
Posted Image|Posted Image
Posted Image|Posted Image
Posted Image


#19 Taralom

Taralom

    Self-proclaimed A**hole

  • Project Team
  • 1,519 posts
  • Location:Not here
  • Projects:Turned to Writing
  •  I R GOOGL'd

Posted 07 January 2009 - 03:25 PM

xD
Are you reading my mind?

I'll be an umbar faction, but one of it's travelling groups... I've got my first few posts worked out, writing is the only thing that needs to be done.
If the above post offended you in any way,
please take note that, until further notice, I don't care, so get lost.

#20 Taralom

Taralom

    Self-proclaimed A**hole

  • Project Team
  • 1,519 posts
  • Location:Not here
  • Projects:Turned to Writing
  •  I R GOOGL'd

Posted 08 January 2009 - 06:58 PM

I've got a small bit, wrote in during my Dutch class :p

'I'm afraid we must act,' one of the five shady figures said. He looked around the drak room, his eyes met with those of the others. The room was tiny, and had and had an ancient, natural look. Limestone pillars supported a stone roof, coverd with tiny light-emitting plants and other forms of life. The room was only accessible through a wooden doorway. On the ohter side of the imposing door lay a courtroom, in which these shady figures gave their orders in name of Umbar, the faction these men supported.
'Who then are we going to send? Supreme master, this could be a dangerous task, and it must not be taken lightly!'
The Supreme master adjusted his hood before replying. 'I was thinking of sending Maur and his student.' He looked around the room, and saw that one of the figures came forward and kneeled. 'Fourth master, rise and speak.'
'Thank you, Supreme one.' The fourth master despised the endless traditions of these meetings, but he was careful not to show that. 'I would suggest sending Gaurr Zant and his student.'
'What? Varin Rax?' One of the shady figured stepped forward, clearly the second master. 'Agreed, the boy is talented, but sending him would only mean his...'
'Silence!' The Supreme master cut him off. 'The fourth master has a point. Varin is turning 21 next week, and he will be taking his exam then. This could be some training for the boy.'
'But, Supreme one!' the second master muttered.
'No! I feel that this boy is touched by destiny. Send for Gaurr and Varin immediatly!'
The other masters bowed, and quickly walked away, in search for the two magicians.


This will be the first part of my first post. Do you have tips, suggestions, comments etc. ?

Any comments on grammar would be MOST appreciated.

Edited by Taralom, 08 January 2009 - 06:59 PM.

If the above post offended you in any way,
please take note that, until further notice, I don't care, so get lost.




0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users