16 replies to this topic

[Elric]

I have no idea if I even posted this on here (meaning Revora) but most people that know anything about me, by now know that I am a website designer. 

 

That being said, all of my previous personal websites I have found are not "worthy" of being published on here, until today. So, without further ado I would like to announce that my website has been finalized and has been entered into my states website design competition which I won last year and hopefully again will win this year.

 

My Website:

http://www.cameronandrews.com/

 

I am taking all criticisms and would love to hear what everyone has to say.

[Irenë Hawnetyne]

Meh. A bit chunky.

[Elric]

How is it chunky? 

[MattTheLegoman]

It comes up as blocked on my internet. =p Reason: CT-Parked_Domains

 

 

Any idea why? (I'll go down to IT and ask them to unblock it if they can, just so I can see your website.)

[Elric]

No idea, my website is hosted through Revora so i have no clue. Might be where you live i suppose?

[Irenë Hawnetyne]

    

I'm gonna tear this apart now, but don't get offended. It's just advice for your benefit.

 

Clunky as in, the navbar's way too thick and takes up too much room. Also call me a nitpicker, but your use of language is far too ... well:

That first sentence sounds like part of the evaluation of an experiment - and in the latter you don't need to say prove, it quite literally shows how much you feel the need to prove yourself. Honestly, you need to 'own' your company. Advertise your skills, but don't sound like a 16 year old. Don't capitalize "Website Design", either.  Through my Website Design, I have become detail oriented and organized. This has turned into one of my great many strengths which can be proven by the fact that I won the PA State Website Design Competition in 2013. 

 

 

 

 

Also, Services>Website Design,

I feel like you mean 'reliable'.        I experience to be realiable and will help do troubleshooting if an issue arises

 

 

 

  

Take a look at my Graphic Design section to see some of the work I have accomplished.

 

 

Good god. Anything else! Just... 'some of my' (or our, if you will) 'previous works'. And stop capitalising 'Graphic Design'.

 

 

As the internet thrives so does its technologies, as more and more users use mobile devices such as smart phones to access websites the better it is for your website to be Responsive, or in other words Mobile Friendly. Using the latestest CSS3 technology i will hand tailor the responsive design for your website and will test it one a multitude of devices to make sure its compatibility is top notch.

*do

*; as

*responsive

*mobile friendly

*latest

*I

*on

 

A new concept that I thought of that happenes to be a real design element

 

I'm sorry, aside from 'happenes', this sentence is... ugh, I dislike it strongly.

'An innovative new design element which I alone implement' or something? Just... good god.

 

These websites are easy to customize because with two lines of code that are pretty easy to understand you can add entire sections to pages.

 

Tell me why the customer should care. Or rather, just get rid of this sentence.

 

Services> Graphic Design>

I will assist you in creating and developing your logo to your hearts content

 

Ew. Remember the customer should not have to have much input unless they wish to.

 

There's more but I can't be bothered trawling through it right now.

[Bofur]

On my Mac, your email and the "Top notch HTML5 & CSS3 Developer" bit are too close to the edge, and you can't see past "Articles" on the menu bar.

 

Also, clear iOS 7 inspiration there

 

And yeah, that menu bar could do with being a little less tall. But otherwise, awesome

[Elric]

I dont have an iMac so i had no idea thanks Bofur! and Irene, i only posted the pictures of "my" graphic design work. Grammar is being altered tonight (help from my dad).

 

EDIT:

 

Bofur i checked it out on my dads 21.5" imac and it works fine, i also checked iphone, ipad, ipad mini etc.

 

--

 

Irene: Altered the grammar and the caps Graphic and Website Design should stay like that because caps is different over in America.

[Bofur]

Ah, I've got it. It works in full-screen viewing mode, but not when it's in a window in OSX Safari.

[Elric]

In safari on my dads mac running mavericks:

 

small (like yours??), not full screen:

 

 

large (fullscreen working):

 

 

EDIT:

 

@Irene again: My dad says everything else looks fine, some stuff we reworded and or took out.

[Gen.Kenobi]

I quite like it. Also the lastest blog post right bellow the section you're visiting is a nice touch, but it can get somehow confusing... and I didn't get that New Systems thingy right on the main page... Also the orbs on the Software page are quite odd... they don't really fit the style in my opnion.

 

Anyways, awesome stuff mate.

[Pasidon]

Already has smarter designs than FaceBook.  That should say something, really.

[Irenë Hawnetyne]

Okay.

[Elric]

for those of you wondering, i won the regionals. Now i go to the state competition which is in may.

[Mathijs]

Main page:

 

*Hand-coded. 

*Remove 'or to add this functionality to your website'. It's redundant and makes the blurb too long (especially when compared to the rest).

 

About me:

 

*high school student, not High School.

*website design, not Website Design, or just make it webdesign.

 

Pricing and availability:

 

*maintenance, not maintenence.

*add a space between 'maintenance' and the bracketed prices.

*change this: "If you would like to find out what my quote for developing your website is, then please use the contact form below and fill in the information with as much detail as you can give me regarding the design. Example: How many pages will there be? How long will it take for you to get content to me? How many photos will I have to end up editing?"

To this: "To find out what my quote for developing your website is, fill in the contact form below. Make sure to add as many details as you can regarding your desired design. How many pages will there be? How long will it take you to get written content to me? How many photos will require editing?" <--- you might also want to consider adding a line about if they're unsure of what they're going to need, you can work with them to find out. Right now it's going to be deterring to people who have no clue about website creation. Maybe a link to your Contact page.

*to "What is 1+1?:", add 'this is to counter spam bots.', same goes for the question on your Contact page.

 

Other Services 

 

*change "My Services are expanding all the time, so, if you dont see anything worth while contact me and I will reply with in 24 hours regarding your request."  to: 'My provided services are often expanded, so if you need something webdesign-related that is not currently covered on this website, Contact [link to form] me and I will reply within 24 hours.

*change:"If you live in the United States around Lancaster, PA I offer custom computer builds which will be designed with budget and hardware in mind. If you need a highend computer but have a budget you can contact me to assist in building your computer no matter the price range. All parts will be ordered from newegg.com and take about a week to ship. Then the computer will be done the day after the parts are delivered. We do pick up only, and no electronic payment."

to: If you live near me (Lancaster, PA, United States), I offer custom computer builds based on your budget and wishes. All parts will be ordered from newegg.com, taking about a week to ship. I will have your computer built the day after shipment, after which you can come pick it up (we do not accept electronic payment). [And, if you're looking to expand your business, add this:] If you don't live near me, I can still assist you in figuring out which parts to order for a custom-built PC based on your budget, and I will be able to offer online help in building it. 

*change: Using my keen eye for design flaws and up to date technologies I will scan the code of your website looking for "broken links" and or other misplaced or out of date data. Example: "Upgrading the existing HTML and CSS to HTML5 and CSS3 which will increase website load times and improve your websites overall performance on all devices." Then depending on if the website is broken enough I may offer a discount to a brand new website design by yours truely.

to: "I can review your website code, looking for broken links and other misplaced/out of date data. I can upgrade existing systems to their latest versions, decreasing website load times and improving overall performance." Don't be a braggart, and don't offer 'maybe discounts'. If the website you're looking through is sufficiently broken, just make your offer personally.

*change: If you are experiencing computer problems i can remotely, using a program called Teamviewer, take a look at your computer and if need be control it to remove any Malware, Adware or other types of negative system bugs

to: "If you are experiencing computer problems I can help you even if you are on the other side of the world. Using Teamviewer I can remove malware, adware and other types of system infections.

 

I think that's about it.

 

I'm a professional translator/blurb writer. This scan I just did for you normally costs people around 15 bucks

[Irenë Hawnetyne]

That was so cool.

[Elric]

Yea, haha i woke up to a link on facebook to a wall of text on my iphone and i was like "holy fuck". Anyways as i was saying to him i will go over it as well as ask my dad and my supervisor (for competition) what they think.