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#1 Pasidon

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Posted 26 September 2014 - 04:37 AM

destiny-face.jpg

Staring crazy tiger mental moon man.  When you have a character creation section, why not look like you're a blind satanic albino?

 

Destiny is a console FPS (fake person simulator) that takes place in the REAL future of REAL mankind.  So people get into space, get chased to near extinction by The Moon Covenant, then something, something... space stuff.  You enter this barren future of homeless moon monsters that like to eat bullets and can't get enough of you punching them thousands of times.  In order to fend off the Martian hoards proper without accidentally chaining yourself to a moon zeppelin and protesting your prime directive, you're given a floating robot guide to state the obvious for you.  Its name is Ghost, because it's terrifying how badly written this character is with a 500 million non-space dollar budget.  Spooky.  But luckily, Bungie bashed their collective heads together at the same time, causing a rift in the space-time continuum.  Out of this hole of horror, the midget that plays Tyrion Lannister in that medieval sex show emerged on a flaming stool and offered to play Ghost's voice.  Not having any voice acting experience, he was an obvious choice.  Who needs good writing or proper voice acting when you have a little angry man getting auto-tuned like a winner?

 

In the game, you join forces with other people who don't actually care about the story and just want to get cool guns and armor so they can beat you to death in the player Vs. player mode while insinuating risque things about your mother.  So more accurately, the story of Destiny is that everyone is a greedy prick and have no real interest in cleansing the Galaxy of the xeno scourge that threatens their very existence.  Not without being paid in guns, obviously.  The real enemy in Destiny is getting lots of loot in as little time as possible.  With the Rules of Acquisition at hand, you and your space cadets follow poorly written voice acting events to find the source of the menacing Moon Wizards.  No... I didn't just use the word "moon" as a space joke this time... there are actually things called Moon Wizards.  If I accidentally made you think this game is silly and stupid, no worries.  It'll do that to itself without my help.  

 

I also wasn't joking about these space plebs eating bullets either.  Every enemy of worth in this game (50% of the scumbags) take so many bullets, it would be easier to send the freaks back to the Roman era just to get them crucified in order to get your loot in a timely manner.  But it's totally worth it.  You need to kill scumbag enemies so you can get sweet loot, so you can kill even scumbagy'er enemies and get even sweeter loot.  When everything and everyone is dead and in a continent sized landfill dedicated to your discarded uncommon items, you have won the game and may continue dwelling in your stepmother's basement.  But if she hears Ghost's voice and thinks you're watching that naughty Game of Thrones nonsense, she may seal your chamber door with cement and consecrate the electric bills to oblivion so that you can sit in a dark hole until Jesus forgives you.  Don't take any risks, people.

 

So to conclude this magical moon journey across 4 whole paragraphs, Destiny is dumb.  They spent 500 million dollars and about 10 years making a game with a story line worse than the dubbed German version of Battleship, and gameplay so repetitive, watching Space Jam 5 times a day for the next 7 years doesn't sound so bad after all.  And yet, they spend all this time and money, and people still found easy ways to exploit the game so they don't have to do any work at all.  Wondrous. And people wonder why the game's scores are lower than the average IQ of a fetus.  Mystery solved, you moon losers.


Edited by Pasidon, 26 September 2014 - 04:48 AM.

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#2 DoMiNaNt_HuNtEr

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Posted 27 September 2014 - 02:39 AM

lol. Thats awesome. Why can't more people write like you?

 

I still haven't played the game. I mean, I thought it looked fun, but. uh... yeeeeah. Not for PC? FUCK. THAT. Also, your reasons.



#3 Pasidon

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Posted 27 September 2014 - 03:36 AM

We give thanks to the PC gods that this rancid trash didn't come to us.  Another hurray for console FPS slags for taking the hit for us once again.  


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#4 DoMiNaNt_HuNtEr

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Posted 06 October 2014 - 11:04 AM

Shit thats too bad I actually wanted this game to be good. I mean just LOOK at this pic, its awesome amirite?

 

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#5 Mathijs

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Posted 06 October 2014 - 11:15 AM

Oh yeah, that looks awesome.


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#6 Pasidon

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Posted 06 October 2014 - 04:46 PM

It's a game that was thought out for years, so it does have several well conceived aspects.  And even though the art style and world is awesome, they forgot to make a good game around it all.


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#7 OmegaBolt

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Posted 06 October 2014 - 10:23 PM

The Angry Joe video on it was pretty funny and summed it up quite nicely.


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#8 DoMiNaNt_HuNtEr

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Posted 24 October 2014 - 03:23 PM

Hey check this out. Kinda like how Tiberian Sun got nerfed, Destiny was supposed to be at least 4 times as more interesting than it currently is:

 

http://www.bungie.ne...st/70895980/0/0



#9 Mathijs

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Posted 24 October 2014 - 03:27 PM

That's a depressing read.


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#10 DoMiNaNt_HuNtEr

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Posted 24 October 2014 - 06:54 PM

lol, I know right? Another very promising game butchered by gay ass politics.

 



#11 Pasidon

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Posted 25 October 2014 - 07:37 AM

That article is tosh.  MMO like Mass Effect?  One guy leaves a multi-million dollar company and everything falls apart?  Cutting content and making it DLC????????  Idiots.  No.  I don't accept a word of that.  Well... besides them cutting content and making it DLC, since they want to be so much like Mass Effect.  Dirtbags.  Listen here... Bungie messed up.  Their direction was good, but their execution was apocalyptic.  What they thought were good ideas were actually pants.  That's the article they should have made.  But no... all we get are excuses.  What's their excuse for hiring someone with no voice acting experience as the lead role?  What's their excuse for the horrendous writing?  Unbalanced, repetitive combat?  Broken, untested exploits that basically broke the game?  Was it because Joe left?  Good old Joe was certainly the belt buckle of that sagging pants of a game. 

 

No, this game is legitimately bad.  And stupid.  Just because Joe left doesn't mean you're allowed to make a serious game with the term "Moon Wizards" in it.   They wanted to market to the 360 and PS3, and that was also a massive mistake.  You physically cannot make a game and expect to accomplish everything you want to do when your terminus ante quim platform is from the stone age of gaming... like 10 years ago.  Mistakes and failures, not unfortunate events out of their control.  You don't have to believe a word I say... but you SHOULD believe that saying "Most of what was cut was planned to be re-polished into DLC, but it's all there on the disc." is beyond stupid, especially if they charge you for this DLC. They released a game that wasn't finished, and it wasn't anything revolutionary.  500 million bucks and like 5 years of development for this, huh?  That's just incompetence.


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#12 OmegaBolt

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Posted 25 October 2014 - 08:30 AM

"Moon Wizard" could be one of the force rewrites you know, to make it more accessible. :p  Even if the original idea was "Moon Wizards" I'd rather see an unbutchered version of that idea, else you'll never know exactly what they were going for and it'll make a lot less sense than it would otherwise. And yeah one guy can easily be all it takes, if he's the link between publisher and developer.


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#13 Pasidon

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Posted 25 October 2014 - 05:22 PM

This is a company that can throw 500 million dollars at a single game.  They should have like 331 Joes.


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#14 OmegaBolt

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Posted 25 October 2014 - 06:24 PM

But that's not how it works. You don't have multiple directors on a film because it'd be a complete mess. Although games are generally less auteured they still often have one lead who basically knows everything about the game and keeps it all making sense. You can't buy more of those people because they'd have completely different ideas about the same material.


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#15 Pasidon

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Posted 25 October 2014 - 07:30 PM

That's why there are creative directors and lead writers, not just one guy doing every creative aspect.  Before the game even gets touched upon, they plan everything out with art style, plot, game mechanics, engine mechanics and aesthetics.  If someone vitally important left during that process, especially on their budget, you drop the project or adapt it to different perspectives if it's not an issue.  But no, they got this process done and their entire direction was set before they started making this game.  Everyone after that is absolutely replaceable.  You follow the guidelines you made during the scripting process, and nothing ever relies on one individual in a AAA game.  Joe left... I don't want to hear that excuse.


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#16 DoMiNaNt_HuNtEr

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Posted 26 October 2014 - 04:55 PM

^^ Not bad at all. 7 outta 7. Why can't there be more Pasidons?



#17 OmegaBolt

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Posted 26 October 2014 - 06:33 PM

It's not an excuse. He was the guy standing between Activision the evil publishers and Bungie the developers. Joe left because of Activision bullshit and they ruined the game.


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#18 DoMiNaNt_HuNtEr

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Posted 26 October 2014 - 06:50 PM

I'm gonna have to go with OmegaBOlt here. yeah, sure, Pasidon's right in a sense. HOWEVER. YOU DO NOT HAVE COMPANY DICTATORSHIP. Therefore, you know nothing. You may assume, but thats about it.

 

The money grubbing politics have killed yet another potentially good game. And now I want to kill. ALOT.



#19 Mathijs

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Posted 26 October 2014 - 07:41 PM

ALOT.png

 

You called?


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#20 Pasidon

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Posted 26 October 2014 - 08:08 PM

So Joe leaving didn't actually do anything.  It was Activision's fault.  That could have been a more valid excuse, but they just say, "Joe left and everything died."  I don't want to hear stuff like that.  If they write a letter like this, I don't want to hear them not taking any responsibility for what happens.  Them saying stuff like that makes it sound like this entire project failing was Joe's fault, for leaving.  And publishers.   I find it hard to believe they had a good game made, then the nasty Activision men came in and slithered the entire project because Joe wasn't there to stop the Activision invaders.  I know they had a lot of the fault for this stupid game, but Bungie is making it sound like they did everything right and they take no responsibility for any of the faults of the game.


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