Unfortunately, this tends to happen at times even when all is well with both players' setups. Try waiting for a minute or two before clicking Start.
Version: Origin (unsure of actual game version - how to find out?)
Steam and Origin versions are always patched to the latest official version, in the case of RA3 - 1.12. You can check that in the bottom of the Options menu.
Thanks for the info on the version. Didn't know Origin kept those older games up to date.
So, there isn't really anything I can do? There must be some way we can play... We tried for an hour getting it to work every which way we could think of. :(
If you two are on the same LAN then DMZ might make things worse (only in this case; in other cases DMZ will help); Try to retry some more times without DMZ enabled.
Otherwise yes you need to use a VPN (one of you use the VPN, another one use the normal internet connection). If your VPN doesn't work, try to use another VPN.
Alright, thanks for the info. Know of any (US) VPN that is known to work?